Friday, April 13, 2012
We are over the Atlantic on the way to Amsterdam…where we will make our connection to Nairobi, Kenya. There are four of us, Dieula, Kineta, Heather and myself. We will meet up with Betty in Nairobi and proceed to Mt. Elgon. Just getting out of Dallas was quite the challenge this year. Personal situations, work, and goodbyes were more taxing than years past and made leaving difficult. But, it was all left behind and we are half way to the people we came to see. As I try to relax and let go of so much at home, I begin to think about where we are headed and who we will meet. Anxiously, I wonder “am I ready?” Am I ready for the stories I will hear and the faces I will see? Am I ready to train people on topics (i.e. suffering and grief) knowing that my experiences will most likely pale in comparison to theirs? Am I ready to set aside expectations and just love and serve the people we will meet? “Am I ready?” It is a foolish question to ask as I have never been ready for anything meaningful. Being a friend, becoming a husband and a dad, healing and the tasting of grace are all magical. But, part of the magic is the fact that I was not ready for any of them. And, that is where trusting God comes in and the prospect of “His strength is made perfect in my weakness” comes to life. And the real question is not “Am I ready?”, but “Am I ready to let go?”
Saturday, April 14, 2012
We landed in Nairobi where we will stay tonight. It quickly struck me how much I missed not making this trip last year…and how very excited I am to see some dear friends.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
We went to church this morning at Nairobi Baptist Church. Afterward, we ate lunch and embarked on the flight/drive to Mt. Elgon. Everyone is generally relaxed and enjoying each other. At least that is my read J. Tomorrow, Dieula and I will tag team the topic of servant leadership. It was one of many areas where Jesus shocked his culture, not for the sake of shocking it, but for the sake of correcting it and realigning it with God. Jesus sought the broken and disenfranchised to love them and affirm them. Abandoned by His culture and eventually denied by his closest friends, Jesus was crucified in an empire called Rome at a time when executions were intended to torture and humiliate. But His eyes were on redeeming us regardless of the cost. And that type of leadership is the challenge for us as we serve and we will teach on it tomorrow.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Today went great. The entire day was dedicated to servant leadership. Nehemiah was discussed as a servant leader who in community brought his heart before the Lord appealing for intervention on behalf of the Israelite’s affliction by Babylon. The connection was made that we too should appeal to God to intervene on the damage that was inflicted upon Mt. Elgon primarily in 2006-2008. I had heard and read about some of the things that happened during that time, but to hear them spoken from the mouths of victims and to see them written down was sobering and unimaginable. This being shared with the prospect of hope by those sharing it was the highlight of the day. There is no natural reason to explain why victims such as these could have hope and such capacity to forgive. And, I know it shouldn’t surprise me, but it does; it is the redemptive power of God working in their lives that sustains them. It is impossible to miss.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Today was relaxing and I did not have to present. I was able to just watch the other team members do presentations and they are all doing great...very knowledgeable in their material and such a connection with the women. If it were not for the color of their skin or the language they speak, you could not tell the African women from the American women. They are engaged and there are no lines of race or class or nationality. It is the body of Christ as it should be…many members in one body. While I did not present, Dieula and I got to spend over an hour meeting with the men pastors. These men are pastors of the churches where many of the women traveled from. This was a good chance to get the perspective of the men and the pastors who lead their congregations and communities and have served them during and since the 2006-2008 conflict. I was very impressed with their knowledge of the scriptures and their gentle spirits and compassion for their congregation. It was such a blessing to see how the conflict had brought a dozen pastors close together. They now routinely fellowship together and encourage one another. One of the pastors with great vision and conviction made the comment that God has brought good out of something very bad.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Today was the day I was most worried about from a presentation perspective. I taught active listening which was a dynamic discussion where we exchanged feedback and ideas. It went well. But, a biblical perspective of suffering was also on the agenda and I have been very nervous about that. These Africans have seen things that I can’t fathom. But, a biblical perspective on suffering is the same biblical perspective whether in America or Africa. In its simplest form, this world and all of creation and the scriptures testify to the glory of God. And, there is broken man who has always sought to compete with the glory of God. And God wants to cleanse us of that and to trust Him and glorify Him. It is noteworthy that suffering is most often a consequence of man rather than God. Regardless, God uses it to draw mankind to Him. C.S. Lewis calls pain God’s megaphone to a deaf world. Suffering seems to cause so much disbelief; but, that is all based on the perspective that God first and foremost wants our happiness. And that is far from the God of the Bible and there is no better story than the life and crucifixion of Christ to make that point. It is often through suffering that redemption comes. The discussion went fine. After the meeting, we accompanied a pastor and drove to two homes where people were sick to encourage them and pray for them.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Today was the day for my presentation on the biblical perspective of grief. This was a little easier than the suffering topic. It was interesting to research this topic. I used the story of Lazarus and the Psalm 22 to illustrate the biblical approach to suffering as seen by the life of David and Christ. The bottom line was to bring our open heart to God with honesty and be communal. David in the Psalms, Christ on the Cross, Christ in the Garden, Dietrich Bonheoffer (from Tegel Prison in Berlin during the Holocaust) all show vivid pictures of how to lament before God and to still be able to praise Him. To say this is inspirational, given the events these individuals faced, is an understatement. They all faced persecution and the threat of death. Yet, they lamented before the Lord with raw honesty. And in the midst of that, they praised Him. After the meeting, we walked to a home where Celestine lived. She appeared to be 20 and has two kids and has lost her father and her husband in the past 2 years. Celestine and her two children have been adopted by a woman who is at the conference. Twelve of us sat in a small room, listened to her story and sang and prayed for her. The rain fell on the tin roof that leaked. There was something magical about that family. The load they carry and the adversity they face is not small, yet their simple and faithful approach to the next day is something so many, including me, could learn from. We ate dinner with the ALARM staff. They get loving nationals, empowering nationals and using strong theology and training to do it. Their hearts are for their brothers and sisters and it is a privilege to work with them. We made sure they knew that by the time dinner was over J.
Friday, April 20, 2012
Today was a long and a good day. We said goodbye to the women leaders and pastors. As we were closing up, many of the women and pastors shared how much progress had been made from the first pastor’s conference a few years ago until now. As well, people described how they had been impacted during the week of training and sharing. Stories of isolation moving to community and resentment being let go of were reoccurring themes. As is usually the case, healing and transformation do not happen overnight. But, it is happening and they gave glory to God and thanks to ALARM for remembering them and persistently encouraging them about the hope of restoration. We drove to the airport after the conference was over. During the drive, we stopped by and visited an orphanage that the ALARM-Kenya office supports. It is always great to see, play with, and encourage children. Once we got to the airport, we flew to Nairobi, Kenya. There we split up. Heather and Kineta began their trip back to the U.S. tonight and Betty will fly back to New Jersey tomorrow. Dieula and I began our second phase of the trip to Congo and made a connection to Kigali, Rwanda where we will stay the night. Tomorrow, we drive to Goma, Congo.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
We drove from Kigali, Rwanda to Goma, Congo and arrived at 1pm. Crossing the border took some time and as is always the case, I felt the weight of leaving Rwanda and entering Congo. We were greeted once we crossed the border by Marie Jeanne, Theophile, Esperance, and Didi. It is a mystery what puts them on my heart so much. It was great to see them again and we headed to the ALARM-Congo office. Waiting there was a group from an orphanage, pastors, and micro-finance loan recipients to share and exchange dialogue about how ALARM has helped them. There were a variety of stories including women building businesses that could help support their family, men supporting their wives and challenging African culture, and men and women adopting and caring for orphans. Men and women adopting orphans seem to be fairly common and unfortunately very necessary. We headed to the hotel for dinner and will get ready for a very long day tomorrow.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Today, we had a very busy schedule. First, we drove to the church to present and meet with pastors. The church was an hour drive away and involved us driving toward the volcano that erupted eight years ago and covered most of Goma with lava. During the drive, we passed through the areas where both the UN peacekeepers and Goma military were in place to keep the rebels at bay and confined to the opposite side of the volcano. It is quite a sober drive and we had to keep our cameras out of sight as taking pictures in such a place is not a good idea. We gradually climbed the mountain and made it to Kibumba where we attended the church service. This is an area where there are many displaced peoples from the war and they are trying to adjust to farming a new terrain and taking care of their family. The pastors are leaders in the community and are struggling to provide all the resources their flock requires. During the service, Dieula and I were able to speak and say a few words to encourage the congregation and specifically the pastors. ALARM has provided seed for crops, shoes and clothes to help those making the transition. Challenges still exist as the terrain is difficult to farm and the rainfall has been very erratic the past couple of years. There was fatigue as eating and selling food/crops has been difficult and this impacts their ability to care for their families as well as send their kids to school. Money is required for school as there is no government program. Needless to say, school is important for the kids. We ate with the pastors and women leaders. Then, we returned to Goma and drove through the town and I was reminded of the impact of the volcano as lava in the form of bumpy roads and rock walls was everywhere. We went to a small track of land owned by ALARM. After the land, we drove to Theophile’s home and visited with he and his wife, Domitilla. It was a very special visit. Our prior trip to his home 3 years ago was to mourn the passing of Cherry, Theo and Domitilla’s three month old daughter. It was great seeing Domitilla and her joy returned. Next, we went to visit with 4 child soldiers. Ten and thirteen were the ages of the two who shared when they were taken from their families and homes by the rebels. The ten year old was forced to fight for four years and the thirteen year old for two years prior to a risky and delicate rescue by the UN peacekeepers. Though it was through translation, seeing the weight of that experience in their eyes as they spoke was hard to miss. And hearing that their family and community had not been willing to receive them home again, which unfortunately is fairly common, is difficult to fathom. Another strike against going home was the prospect of them being recruited again by the rebel army after having been saved by the UN peacekeepers. As it stands, they are building a new life in a new city and have taken a 3-month rehabilitation program offered by the UN and are receiving re-entry assistance offered by ALARM. The first that shared his story was named Augustine and he has completed secondary school since arriving in Goma. They are still children as they recover from the trauma, assimilate into a new society, and find a way to support themselves. Doing that without their family/community is no small task and the temptation to return to the life they were thrown into lingers.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Today we met early and took at 70 kilometer ferry ride from north Lake Kivu (where Goma, Congo is located) to south Lake Kivu (where Bukavo, Congo is located). The lake was just beautiful and provided walls of mountains with villages on both sides as we headed south. While this is my fourth trip to Congo, this was my first trip to Bukavo and the first item on the agenda today was visiting the Panzi Hospital. It is a 400 bed hospital where 160 beds are dedicated to women for medical conditions related to fistula and sexual trauma/rape most of which come from the war. We spoke to an administrator and a physician and learned about the services they provide. They are known world-wide for being an advocate for women who are sexually attacked in the war that has raged in Congo for over 15 years. Juxtaposing a facility that is relatively well funded and well staffed offering medical, psychological, social and spiritual services to the women who are victims of sexual trauma provides a contrast of horror and beauty. They had walls that displayed cards from women all over the world showing their picture and offering words of encouragement and support to the women patients who had touched their hearts even half a world away. From the hospital, we drove to a church where we would hear from three groups of people. The first was from women who had attended the trauma conference from a year ago. Their sharing was tender. Stories were told of being physically and sexually attacked for some periods that were isolated and others that lasted up to a month. Deep pain, resilient belief, and the beginning seeds of healing were all visible at the same time. Next, we met with the pastors. They were universally fatigued and some were angry. It reminded us that men too have seen trauma and the pressure they feel to care for their flock and protect their flock is extreme. And to do so in a world where war has lived for 15 years and still incurs numerous horrific casualties is quite the challenge. We agreed that we needed to bring more training for the pastors and afford them to the opportunity to deal constructively with their trauma and bring them close together. Healing, restoration and community are reoccurring themes of the training conferences and we need to do more in Bukavo. The last meeting was with a Christian group of lawyers. In an environment where the legal structure is more unstructured and corrupt, it is even more important that the lawyers set examples and be advocates to victims of injustice. They had many examples of fighting corruption and protecting the rights of their people and even creating sustainable change within their justice system. It is a long road, but they are doing great work and seeing great fruits. All of their work is predicated on God’s creation of men and women and their being entitled to justice and dignity. At the end of our meeting, we said goodbye to most of the ALARM-Congo staff and crossed the border to Rwanda and prepared for our long trip home that would begin early tomorrow.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
We flew three segments from Rwanda and made it to Nairobi, Kenya. We had an 8 hour layover and were able to reconnect with the ALARM-Kenya staff that we served in Mt. Elgon with. It was very good to see them and meet some new faces. We also began what will be a long process of unwrapping some of the stories and meaning from our time in Congo. After we visited with our friends, we said goodbye and returned to the Nairobi airport and began our trip home. I am empty and tired and can see the faces of Paula, Bailey, Brooke, and Braden. Soon, I will see them. And, again I will have a new perspective of what it is to have the blessings of a healthy family in a peaceful land.
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We are back from Africa and this is the part where I try to unpack what we saw and how it impacted me…and then share it. But, that is not easy as emotions, questions and convictions seem to run wild. On the theme of injustice, I can’t get used to the horrific things that we are capable of. Perpetrator or bystander or more subtly beneficiary, we tolerate so much destruction when we have the power to act and often the power to help. How does one see the face and hear the name and story of a child soldier, a victim of war rape, an orphan, or a pastor struggling to provide for his flock in the midst of war and poverty and not be affected? How then does one share that story in a way that gives the child, the man or the woman dignity? What are we doing to each other? How do we not see it and just continue to allow it? What is my role?
Even so, the horror we are capable of is outdone by the restoration that God can bring. And, on the theme of restoration, it is stupefying to see how God can restore what we have so blatantly tried to destroy. During this trip, it was really apparent how God’s restoration is communal. He chooses to restore us by using us. A victim tells their story and is loved and supported by others who listen. An African national loves their neighbor and intentionally trains them and encourages them. A victim confronts their perpetrator to forgive the unimaginable. Someone confronts God with questions and deep pain and learns what they can scarcely fathom…to trust again. Restoration involves us engaging each other and engaging God and being honest and seeking healing. Cities can be restored by another means, but not hearts. And, isn’t it the restoration of the heart that we most want?
Restoration is a holy symphony that is hard to listen to much less sit still for. It takes an act of God within a time and a process that we can not understand; and it requires the courage of the victim to share their story in a safe place, forgive the one that hurt them and trust in the one that can heal them. At various times, we have all been perpetrators, victims, or bystanders. Regardless of where we find ourselves now, we must step outside ourselves to see each other and to serve each other. And, when we do, we become the Body of Christ in all its glory. Jesus did not just see the disenfranchised, He saw himself as one of the disenfranchised. In Matthew, Chapter 25, He speaks of the “least of these”…as the hungry, the thirsty, the stranger, the unclothed, the sick, the imprisoned…and says, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’. It is beyond profound that Christ saw the afflicted and willingly chose the life of the afflicted so that Love may be restored. God’s response to destruction is restoration. And, it is no coincidence that God’s response to the crucifixion was the resurrection. There is a theme of God redeeming what we break and it always seems to come back to that.
Now to put a period on this long sentence. I heard a message Wednesday on the command that Jesus gave to "love one another". We discussed how He did it in ways His culture and ours would consider radical and unconventional. The questions, "What is love?" and "Who is one another?" simmer in my mind.
Thursday morning, I was discussing the trip with a friend and on my frequent soap box about how we need to do more.
She asked, "why did you go?"
I indicated that we need to go to places more than just those where our appetite and feelings lead us and that we too often treat love as a feeling.
She asked again, "why did you go?"
I asserted how we often only love people who are like us and can give back to us comparing contemporary expressions of love to barter.
Becoming a little frustrated because I was not answering the question, she pressed "why did YOU go? You have made the trip four times, why?"
I struggled to find an answer which is often the case with me when a question is a very personal one. Thoughts and emotions race...Sacrifices my friends and family make every year to support the trip. Love for my African brothers and sisters and hope for their well being. A conviction that we must let all people know that they are not forgotten. A deeply held belief that confronting brokenness is where God's redemption begins.
Why did I go?
I have to go. Every year, I feel a burden. Find a way. Make the trip. Love one another.
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We are back from Africa and this is the part where I try to unpack what we saw and how it impacted me…and then share it. But, that is not easy as emotions, questions and convictions seem to run wild. On the theme of injustice, I can’t get used to the horrific things that we are capable of. Perpetrator or bystander or more subtly beneficiary, we tolerate so much destruction when we have the power to act and often the power to help. How does one see the face and hear the name and story of a child soldier, a victim of war rape, an orphan, or a pastor struggling to provide for his flock in the midst of war and poverty and not be affected? How then does one share that story in a way that gives the child, the man or the woman dignity? What are we doing to each other? How do we not see it and just continue to allow it? What is my role?
Even so, the horror we are capable of is outdone by the restoration that God can bring. And, on the theme of restoration, it is stupefying to see how God can restore what we have so blatantly tried to destroy. During this trip, it was really apparent how God’s restoration is communal. He chooses to restore us by using us. A victim tells their story and is loved and supported by others who listen. An African national loves their neighbor and intentionally trains them and encourages them. A victim confronts their perpetrator to forgive the unimaginable. Someone confronts God with questions and deep pain and learns what they can scarcely fathom…to trust again. Restoration involves us engaging each other and engaging God and being honest and seeking healing. Cities can be restored by another means, but not hearts. And, isn’t it the restoration of the heart that we most want?
Restoration is a holy symphony that is hard to listen to much less sit still for. It takes an act of God within a time and a process that we can not understand; and it requires the courage of the victim to share their story in a safe place, forgive the one that hurt them and trust in the one that can heal them. At various times, we have all been perpetrators, victims, or bystanders. Regardless of where we find ourselves now, we must step outside ourselves to see each other and to serve each other. And, when we do, we become the Body of Christ in all its glory. Jesus did not just see the disenfranchised, He saw himself as one of the disenfranchised. In Matthew, Chapter 25, He speaks of the “least of these”…as the hungry, the thirsty, the stranger, the unclothed, the sick, the imprisoned…and says, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’. It is beyond profound that Christ saw the afflicted and willingly chose the life of the afflicted so that Love may be restored. God’s response to destruction is restoration. And, it is no coincidence that God’s response to the crucifixion was the resurrection. There is a theme of God redeeming what we break and it always seems to come back to that.
Now to put a period on this long sentence. I heard a message Wednesday on the command that Jesus gave to "love one another". We discussed how He did it in ways His culture and ours would consider radical and unconventional. The questions, "What is love?" and "Who is one another?" simmer in my mind.
Thursday morning, I was discussing the trip with a friend and on my frequent soap box about how we need to do more.
She asked, "why did you go?"
I indicated that we need to go to places more than just those where our appetite and feelings lead us and that we too often treat love as a feeling.
She asked again, "why did you go?"
I asserted how we often only love people who are like us and can give back to us comparing contemporary expressions of love to barter.
Becoming a little frustrated because I was not answering the question, she pressed "why did YOU go? You have made the trip four times, why?"
I struggled to find an answer which is often the case with me when a question is a very personal one. Thoughts and emotions race...Sacrifices my friends and family make every year to support the trip. Love for my African brothers and sisters and hope for their well being. A conviction that we must let all people know that they are not forgotten. A deeply held belief that confronting brokenness is where God's redemption begins.
Why did I go?
I have to go. Every year, I feel a burden. Find a way. Make the trip. Love one another.